In my previous entry, I made this comment: "I'm all
for 'helpful suggestions on how I may improve.'"
Truly! It may not seem that way, given my tone of frustration / disbelief / arrogance / condescension, but I do want to be better.
The problem is: I'm good. Every FP I do without healer-fault death rams the point home. I'm good and I damn well know it.
And therein lies the danger. No example of this is more poignant for me than the Case of Devrim.
Healer's Log 20160806. Lost Island.
LI is my favorite FP -- hard bosses that require lots of thinking and even dangerous trash-pulls. Devrim is the tank and he's good. He also spends enough time clearly explaining the fights without overdoing it. And with such an expert healer? We sail through it!
Healer's Log 20161016. Lost Island
Devrim and I meet again in the same spot. But now, we're having a hard time on "Project Sav-Rak"; that's the boss who jumps on pipes, spits poison and knocks you off the platform into the lava. It is one of the toughest tests of a healer's ability in a SWTOR FP. This time, we're having trouble and this time, Devrim focuses on me. He explains that his main is a sage healer and he says I'm overusing Salvation (AoE heal), which is bad because it (1) costs too much force and (2) doesn't heal much. Better, says Devrim, would be Wandering Mend, because it jumps to others and heals them more efficiently.
I'm having a hard time with his logic. I'm also thinking of how good I am, about all the times I healed through this difficult FP. His "advice" is so deep into "how to do my job" that it reaches the level of "nagging". I'm not "angry". I'm frustrated and sad and I feel my will running out of me, like water running down the drain when you pull the bath plug. A readycheck ... I stare at it, not answering, still trying to recover my motivation.
Battle ... wipe. Run back. More "helpful healer advice". Now I'm getting angry. Readycheck ... I'm immobile, stuck in a cloud of negative emotion.
"I'm sorry. I cannot continue." I leave. I tell myself it's better than rage-quitting.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Before I queue for another FP, I'm at the spreadsheet.
(WARNING: mathematical discussion incoming. If you don't have the stomach for it, skip the next six paragraphs and resume reading at the paragraph where I contemplatively frown).
A party is four. An operation is eight or 16. "Eight" is also the number of people in a Warzone. Salvation (SALV) heals up to eight people. Wandering Mend (WM) heals up to four. Each of them benefit from Conveyance, which we assume is active, because that's what a good healer does and I, of course, am good. Yeah.
In a Party of Four, if I perfectly hit all with WM (i.e., their distances from each other are just right), then total HPS (heal per second) is 7,760.5; HPF (heal per force) is 633.5. In that same party, a SALV hitting all four has HPS 2,744.4 and HPF 576.6.
Clearly, WM is better for group healing. But wait -- SALV has a greater chance of affecting all four -- with WM, each player must be within 20m of the player with the WM buff, else WM won't jump. Based on experience, I believe I can hit merely one person 5% of the time, two people 30%, three about 50% and all four maybe 15% of the time. Factoring that in (without further spamming the math), I come out to an estimated average for the use of WM in a 4-man: HPS remains relatively constant at 7,760.5 because of the time delay bewteen WM's jumps, but the HPF goes down to 435.54.
For SALV, I estimate a 50-50 split of getting it to cover three or four members, which averages out to HPS 2,401.4 and HPF 504.5.
Mathematical Conclusion: in a 4-man party, WM heals for more, but SALV uses my force power more efficiently -- but not by much.
Hmm. Just for shits & giggles, let's consider SALV in an 8-man op (or a Warzone). Hitting all eight people with it is HPS 5,488.8 and HPF of 1,153.1 Can't argue with that! Of course -- that's 8-man, not 4-man; and assumes perfect conditions.
<contemplative frown> Could Devrim -- under all his unpleasant nagging and overdblown advice -- be right?
Numbers are good, but they're only theory, an all-things-being-equal estimate of how something might happen. They're a good starting point, but you cannot rely on them alone. Practical experience is where it's at.
So for the next dozen or so FPs, I focus primarily on WM and only use SALV when I need group heals and WM is not ready.
At the end of my testing, the result is clear: WM is superior to SALV. The main benefit for me: more efficient use of force power -- I can heal longer and I need Noble Sacrifice less.
Well ... how about that?
Three weeks after Devrim drained my motivation with his unsolicited advice, I embrace it. I sigh at the lost time. He shares the blame -- he could have been more constructive in his criticism instead of being a pompous know-it-all. But hey -- getting someone to improve their behavior without irritating them is a tough line to walk. It takes a lot of emotional intelligence and most of us aren't perfect. So rejoice and be glad -- you learned something. Forgive. Move on.
I take Devrim off /ignore.